Depression...

Depression...emotions that have recently caused much concern for both the wellbeing of myself and my baby. Depression seems to almost be synonymous with pregnancy nowadays with all of the changes that occur during this time, along with the juggling act women seem to need to do in life. I definitely never envisioned that this would be a serious concern for me, however, now it seems to be the reality I am facing, no matter how I try to be balanced and maintain my mental health.

Perhaps I also had been fooled to think that I had a strong support system in place. Now being at this place in my life, it has become one of the loneliest times of my life. Recently, I have been feeling completely isolated from the rest of the world, and nobody seems to have the time of day for me. It is a completely helpless feeling that has made me find myself in tears sporadically. When trying to look at these emotions rationally, I know that there are so many changes going on both physically and mentally, that it is only natural to feel emotional. However, this does not make any of it easier. I had also thought that my yoga regiment may help in balancing my emotions as well, but it just makes me wonder how much more I would be spiraling downward if I did not have the yoga to calm my mind a little bit.

With my emotional state being the way that it is currently, I am truly concerned about post partum depression. The last thing I would want is to miss out on any part of my baby's life because I could not get myself out of a cloud of depression. I don't know where to turn...but can only hope to emerge out on the other side...

The Love for your Child...

I have now reached 24 weeks, the third trimester. I must now brace myself for my tummy to expand even more dramatically, and am wondering how my nesting instincts will be. I would not be surprised to find myself frantically cleaning the house in about a month or so.

When reflecting on my love for my fur baby Kobi (chihuahua), it frightens me to think that I could possibly love anything more in this world. Several people have remarked to me that the love for your baby would surpass the love for your pet immensely, something that seems almost unimaginable to me at this time. Me and the hubby are very attached to Kobi, and I believe that I echo his sentiments when describing our love for him. We basically consider him to be our first born. I can honestly say that it breaks my heart to see that the little fur baby is aging before our eyes. He will be 6 years old on March 18, and quite a bit of white fur has already sprouted around his muzzle and eyes. It seems like yesterday that we brought him home and he was just the tiniest furball staring at us with those big black eyes. I guess I will probably be thinking the same sort of thing about our baby's growth in a few years time, minus the fur.